The psychology of concerns

For 50 days I did not have those small worries that we all know very well.

There was one big concern- LIFE.

Now life is so normal that I wonder if it was only few days ago that I was so afraid.

I saw yesterday that even the Saturday's motorcyclists and the cyclists are back on the road

again, and I knew that it is the time for the small and daily worries again.

50 DAYS

50  days of war are over. I think some of us suffer from PTSD.

There is a relief, but we are very careful.

There were several wars here, but sense of life threatening was stronger than ever this time.

Some of us paid personal price in past wars, including I, but this time the sense of helplessness

leaves you exhausted when the sounds of the sirens are over.

Each war brings new element that we did not experienced before.

It is a good thing to repress the thoughts about the next time. 

walking with dogs

All over  Blogland people are walking with their dogs in such beautiful areas.

They cross bridges, walk in green green fields, walking near rivers and castles.

Sometimes I wish I  could walk with my dog to Blogland.

Here is where we walk every morning at 6 o'clock.

more of the same

I don't remember if it the day 46 or 49 of this war.

I talked with some of my friends who are grandmothers too

and found out that they feel what I feel. We are tiered and sad.

Of course there are people here that suffer more, so we should be happy with what we have.

Last Saturday we played for a couple of hours in between we have to go to the sheltered room 3 times.

than I drove home those 35 minutes and came home to the sirens here. 

real time

Before I went to Tel-Aviv I checked how safe it is.

The orange rectangles on the TV let us know where are the sirens

in real time.

I saw that there are sirens in my gran kids area.

I took the train to Tel- Aviv any way.

May be I can get use to live with fear.

bomb shelter again

My legs and hands are still shaken.I just

came back from the bomb shelter.

I knew it is coming when I saw that there are rockets all over the country.

The siren was few minuets ago.

our bomb shelter is a place where children are playing their music in days of peace.

I took some photos tonight.

I think I am not going to sleep soon. It is almost midnight but the sirens are now all over Israel.

monday morning

Shirley deserve more photos of fruits and vegetables. 

So I went to our small one and only supermarket (mini market as we call it).

Monday morning is not a good day to take photos there, but I did.

Tel- Aviv

Saturday morning in Tel-Aviv's harbour.

36 hours till the end of the ceasefire.

I don't listen to the news, I do not watch TV's  news. I do not read the news paper today.

I am waiting.Monday evening I'll start watching the news again.

I have nothing to wear

If you have a protected room in your house, no problem.

You can sleep with your pyjamas or what ever you wear at night.

But if you have to run at nights outside to spend 10 minutes with your

neighbours in the bomb shelter, you have to be careful with what you are wearing before 

you go to sleep.

Ceasefire now and I wonder if I should trust the Hamas and should go back to my less presentable clothes before I go to sleep.

.

happy day

We had a quiet day so we did something that we were dreaming about since last summer.

At midnight we shall know more about the coming days.

will the ceasefire continue or not.

The morning begins with carefuly watching the street

than outside to play 

war and dog

Being a dog during war time must be very tiring.

You watch your owner that her ears are not so big

and not big enough like yours. Being a dog you can here the sirens

from the near by villages even if there no siren in your village , and then you watch 

your owner to see if she is going to run outside where ever she is running day and nights.

Being a dog you sleep now in the corridor , thing you never did before , but before she ran to

the bomb shelter she used to stand in that small corridor when the sirens were going on and on.So 

now you sleep there at nights, just in case.

Sneaky the cat

yesterday was the international cat day. ( I did not know but my son texted me from Europe).

so I decided that it is a good time to make an homage to sneaky the cat.

Sneaky was a stray cat. I saw him for many months sitting on the trash cans in the street.

It was his territory and he did not let other cats to live there.

When Edmund the cat decided to come to live with us about a year ago, Sneaky watched him very carefully.

at the beginning he just ate with Edmund and kept him company at meal times.

Slowly he began to trust us. (me and my son).And now, after a year he is calling me in the mornings if I am

late and he wants his meals to be served in time.

He wants my attention when ever I am sitting on the porch. I don't sit in the porch very much this days so 

he is knocking on the door and calling me out.

I noticed that cats are indifferent to the alarms, unlike dogs and humans who get very scared.

happy is the believer

(All the photos here were taken by my 4 years old granddaughter with my iPhone)

We were so sure and happy because we really believed this is the

end of the war. So we went out after a month to near by restaurant.There were 2 quiet days. No more.

minute after the end of the ceasefire, 8 o'clock in the morning Hamas renewed their rocket fire.

At least we had a very happy and quiet (OK, relatively quiet with 3 kids- 2, 4. 5 )evening in the restaurant

.

back to lazy gardening

I started this blog as an experiment. I wanted to improve my English

and to get over my fear of loosing my privacy.I  know that every thing that

you post in the Internet will stay there forever and am not sure about it.

This blog was almost secret. Shirley from Australia was my one and only loyal

reader and I was happy with that. 

The war brought more people here. Most of them really helped me

to pass those scary days. There were also some negative and full of hatred comments which I 

deleted.

I did not bomb Gaza. I am a grandmother who does not want to be hurt by a missile and 

don't want my Grandchildren to get hurt.

I hope that from now on my blog will be more happy blog.

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Now it is time to go back to my lazy gardening.

Dose any body knows what is this flower and how should I keep it alive?

peace and quiet

Ceasfire now. five minutes before it started there was a missile barrage all over Israel.

Now it is quiet for 2 hours.

I still have that Gas masks that we did not have to refresh this time.
(Those boxes above are our gas masks from onother war. We have to keep them just in case...)

day 26

These were not the August sky this morning. More like a winter sky.Sky of war time.

I hear in the news that tomorrow will be the final ceasefire. They tell us also that this night is going to be a dangerous night as  nights before ceasefire are.

And this is what I sent to Jhon's( from Going gently) competition

Escapism

October, 2009, Palermo, Sicily.

small decisions- day 26

To take a shower in the morning or the evening?

What to wear at night before the run to the shelter?

Leave the car window open while driving to hear the alarm?

To break my diet now because I might hurt by a missile and who cares anyway? 

To respond to the blogger who claimed that Israelis are paranoid?

day 26 and I am keeping my war routine and going in few minutes to take care of my Grand kids in the protected room.