Yom Kippur eve.
I'm not religious, but you can't ignore this holiday. It's always been that way. This is a holiday where you fast, ask for forgiveness and believe (those who believe) that on this day everyone's fate is determined. There are no cars on the roads and there are no radio and television broadcasts. It's always been that way.
But like everything with us, everything is always emotionally charged and complicated, It is no coincidence that 51 years ago the Yom Kippur War broke out in which we were attacked from all sides.
This war left me a very young widow with a baby girl.
And now this war, it still has no end.
Rumors say that even today we may be attacked, there is an incessant noise of planes in the sky, something very unusual on Yom Kippur but has become routine for almost a year now.
The phones are next to us because from there will come the message whether to go to the shelters.
In the north, hundreds of rocket launches all day and evening. I want my old life back. The days when I wasn't afraid to take a shower because there might just be an alarm, the days when I didn't arrange my shoes so that I would find them in the dark if I had to run to the shelter at night, the days when I could plan for tomorrow without saying at the end of every sentence "if everything will be alright".
And there are also good things, yesterday my granddaughter sent a message "Grandma, I couldn't ask for a better grandmother".